Is telling someone to ';hush'; rude and disrespectful?

I was driving with my husband and mother in law in the car the other day and was changing lanes. My MIL thought I was going to get off at the exit coming up and yelled ';no thats the wrong exit!! your not suppossed to get off there!';... I wasn't even close to it or acting like I was getting off.(was going to get off at exit after... changing lanes early.) She has been rude the whole weekend we were visiting, especially in the car, so I couldn't take it anymore and said ';hush! If you don't like how I drive, you can walk!';... She thought that was totally disrespectful, but I think it's disrespectful to criticize someone when they're not even doing anything wrong, or using their blinker to change lanes(changing lanes was her request, but I wasn't suppossed to blink).... I won't let her step all over me, but the whole weekend I was silent when she bitched, and she needed to know that is rude for telling someone what not to do when they dont even do it!!Is telling someone to ';hush'; rude and disrespectful?
Everyone here is ignoring the main issue, which is NOT etiquette:





When your mother-in-law yelled at you when you were changing lanes, SHE CREATED A DANGEROUS DISTRACTION THAT COULD HAVE CAUSED AN ACCIDENT. In my opinion, it was perfectly acceptable to tell this witch to shut up and if she couldn't shut up, she could walk. Her shouting is dangerous. PERIOD. Most drivers hear someone in their car shout, immediately recognize that shouting means a dangerous condition exists, and have slammed on the brakes before their conscious mind has even registered what words are being spoken.





No passenger EVER has the right to shout in a car, unless the driver is unaware of a condition that could lead to loss of life.





My husband is visually impaired and although he can see, he can no longer drive. He keeps forgetting that he can't judge distances or speed now, and he periodically falls into the habit of shouting at me when I'm driving. I do exactly what you did - ';You can hush or you can walk. YOU will be the reason we get into an accident, the day your screaming causes me to slam on my brakes in 80 mph traffic or swerve into another lane. You can close your eyes and sleep. You can wear an eye mask and listen to the radio or your iPod. But you will not shout again.';





In fact, we were in a grocery store parking lot over the weekend, during the rain from Hurricane/Tropical Storm Hanna. He shouted at me as I was getting ready to turn into a parking space, and I very nearly skidded straight into some pedestrians when I hit my brakes. So he got reminded again (first time in about 6 months; we're making progress) that he can shut up or walk.





Sorry, everybody. This is a SAFETY issue. NOBODY shouts in the car. Is telling someone to ';hush'; rude and disrespectful?
Oh dear, sounds like you and the MIL were both a little on edge this weekend. She insulted your driving and you rudely told her to hush. You better make sure the next time she rides with you that you set the ground rules before backing out of the driveway. Do it with humor, but make sure she understands that her yelling while you're driving is far worse than you accidentally taking the wrong exit, so it won't be tolerated in your vehicle. Ignore her other request as far as your driving is concerned and do what you know is right (I can't believe she didn't want you to use your blinker!). If she continues to act like an idiot, stop the car and tell her to get out and walk. That's all you can do with some people, but remember to do it with a smile. She IS your MIL and she deserves a certain amount of respect, but not at the price of causing an accident or worse.
sort of yeah it's rude! I find the other comment more rude! If you don't like my driving you can walk! that was the part that made it rude!


if you would of just said shhh.. i got it it wouldn't of came off so harsh!





Put yourself in her nasty shoes for a minute!


What did the driver do to indicate what the driver was doing


To avoid any confustion the MIL didn't know you were going to only switch lanes and to be on the safe side she will correct you even though she don't know 100% what is going on!





who's fault NO ONES!


it was a very common issue that happend! 1 you could have over spoke and said i'm changing lanes


she could of just let you drive!


Neither of you did that and took it overboard!





All moms do this my mom does it all the time! pointing her fingers all around if i'm not were she wants or feels i need to be!!!


and i'm sure you'll do it to someone at least once!





I will say when you keep thigns built up it can come of rude! Tone has a lot to do with the words you say!


Hush isn't rude but HUSH is


Hope this helps some!





good luck!



i understand your frustration, but maybe you could have handled it better. i would probably have said hush, but idk if i would have said the later. after all, she is your mother in law. I'm sure you wouldn't want your hubby speaking to your mother that way, no matter how annoying/rude she may or may not act. maybe get your hubby to have a talk with his mother about how the BOTH of u felt during the visit. don't let him say ';my wife feels like...'; because that leaves her feeling like you don't like/respect her, and puts him in an uncomfortable position. but she does need to be told, that her attitude was unacceptable. if she cant handle it, then what can i say?? in laws are in laws. try dealing with them on birthdays and holidays :P
I know many of Back-Seat drivers and you should have just ignored her or let her vent that anger towards herself.You did the right thing after she continued to ***** at you.She felt bad about it ,but you will never know.People like that have no conscience and don't care about no one but herself,Let go and Let God handle her.
Normally I would say yes, both hush and sush are very rude. Although in your case you were driving and I find nothing more annoying then a person telling you how to drive! That is by far more rude of her than you attempting to tell her to be quiet by saying hush.





Remember you're only human and you can take only so much of her disrespect before you cave in. When you do cave in, it's because you remember that ';I'm an adult'; and as is she, and who is she to carry on like she has been this whole weekend?!





Respect goes both ways, and she needs to earn your respect before you can give it to her. You're her son's wife, and thats allll the more reason for her to respect you. She needs a bit of a reality check from what you make it sound like.





All in all, absolutely annnnny coment can be either mean out of respect or disrespect. It all depends on how it's said, and the circumstances ofcourse. I wish you luck :)
Well, ';hush'; is better than ';shut the f--- up!'; Back seat drivers are hazards because they cause confusion and turmoil. So if you called her on it, she needs to understand that she disrespected you first by implying that you are clueless.





If someone crosses the line, then they need to be ready to get what you decide to give, whether it is tactful or not.
actually the word hush is alot more respectful than shut up. i had a friend that would get mad if she heard someone tell someone to shut up and not hush.
Whoa!! This is your husbands Mom! Slow down there sweetie. First and foremost respect you MIL no matter what. They always think they know above everyone else. Let her have her moments. she comes back at you like that and just wait 3 seconds and say ';got ya';


Bite your tongue okay
All older ppl get stressed about someone else driving and especially someone back talking them. You shouldn't have threatened her, but don't let her plow over you either. She's full of anxiety and that's a VERY annoying trait in a person. It's not likely to change- ever. Just keep her up to date about any changes in lanes beforehand and let her know that she need not snap at you, a simple question will do.